Suffering -- ?

Suffering. What do you think of when you hear the word? It obviously means different things to different people, and i think that we all can bring to mind instances where we've suffered. Some of us may say that we are suffering now. I, in fact, would have said my wife and I are suffering now. Until I got to thinking a little while ago.

Suffering, I realized, is relative. What I consider suffering others consider a walk in the park on a sunny day without a care in the world. And, of course, vice-versa. How, you may ask, would I feel I am suffering? The majority of those who know my wife and I are aware that she quit her job at the end of December, with my encouragement. She was suffering at work, quite genuinely, and had been for some time, and it was time for her to leave there. So, with a great deal of emotionality (she'd been there 10 years), she quit. We figured she'd have no trouble getting another job, but that has not turned out to be the case.

So, she's been off work for nearly two months now. She gets to sit around the house all day... but she hates sitting around the house all day. She worked for ten years straight! Therefore, she suffers from boredom and stir craziness. We had no savings, so we've been struggling to make it on my salary, and while I don't make peanuts, it's barely popcorn, if you get what I mean. Suffering.

BUT...

We still have our apartment; God has provided several times while Marla was still working and since. Last month we did cash advances to make rent -- kinda took it out of His hands there. So our suffering in that respect is nothing compared to those who are having to impose on friends and family, let alone those who have been forced to "live" on the streets. In the same vein, we have sufficient food, her car hasn't been repo'd, and we're healthy.

Yes, life would be easier if my car was running too. Yes, things would be more comfortable if my wife had a job too.

But here's the question: why are we being asked to "suffer"? What is the reason that she can't find a job, that we can't afford to fix or replace our second car, that we don't know where March's rent is coming from? Granted, our suffering is not so great when viewed in context, but it's more than I'd like. So... why?

If I never experienced want, I could have no empathy for those who have. As it is, I can truly say to someone who can't even see the ends, let alone how they meet, that I understand how she feels. I know the fear of looking at the last week of the month and knowing that the two paychecks I have before the date we'd get evicted will pay about half the rent. I know the agony of lying awake at night trying to decide if I own anything worth selling off so I can put enough gas in my (wife's) car to get back and forth to work for another week. I know the hypocrisy of standing in line at Taco Bell to buy lunch, just like everything's normal, when I know that the six bucks I'm about to spend would at least buy stuff to make lunches for a week. I understand all that; I've been there.

I think that's why God sometimes asks us to suffer, at least in relative terms. If we've never been broke, if we've never been truly ill, if we've never known aching loneliness, we can't truly ease the hearts and minds of those who have. Paul and James both tell us to rejoice in suffering, because suffering ends in character, hope, perseverance. Truly that is so, but it won't unless we realize that there's a point to what we're going through. Yes, we will grow from our experiences. But, in addition, we gain the opportunity to help others.

So next time you're suffering, ask yourself how much you're actually suffering. Then ask God who you can help.